Harassment

My sister (who I share a blog with!!) recently moved and has been slowly making new friends and integrating herself into the community she is now living in. Recently, she met some people on the bus and traded numbers with them (yes, they were guys, and yes, she understands that though she has a boyfriend they probably all just want to get into her pants). Moving to a new town puts a person in a tender spot, trying to make friends and learn about new activities sometimes forces you to put yourself out there more than you might in a city you were already comfortable in.

One of the people she gave her number to texted her a few times that evening and the following day. The third day of knowing this guy he began texting her repeatedly throughout the day and began insinuating they were destined to be lovers (or something of the sort) she responded occasionally and did not respond favorably to his suggestions in that regard. By the end of the evening he grew annoyed and his texts became menacing, threatening to rape her, and making other inappropriate comments after she said it wasn't funny to joke about rape (which he had done in a previous text). Upon searching for his name and any other information we could gather about him, we discovered he was 33 (not 25 like he said) was probably not a student at the university she is attending, though he said he was, and was possibly wanted for animal cruelty (specifically, murdering his dog). Of course, this freaked both of us out even more and she called the police about him, though he had stopped texting her and unfriended her on Facebook. The cop couldn't find any information about a warrant out for his arrest but did help her file a quick report about the harassment just in case he started up again.


This story, and this entire situation obviously scared me. Not only was I scared for her, she has actually been stalked before in a more scary way as well, but I was scared for every person who ever tries to move to a new city. This type of thing SHOULD NOT HAPPEN. Giving your number to someone does not guarantee a date, it doesn't even promise you will text them back, but further, it definitely does not mean they can harass you and threaten you. I am SO SO SO thankful that that is all this guy did to her, if he had attempted to rape her, or done worse, you can bet I would be sitting behind bars and that guy would not have any reproductive organs. This man, (possibly not) a productive member of society, acted friendly and looked like a normal person on the bus. It is terrifying that a person can be trying to make new friends, experience a city, and learn everything they can to make a place feel like home and one small attempt can turn into a terrifying experience.

I only hope that IF this guy does still have a warrant out for his arrest he is discovered soon. I love that the officer my sister talked to joked with her to help allay her fears as well as researched everything she told him. If he had questioned her assessment of the harassment I would have maybe lost faith in that much more of society. No one should be afraid to turn to authorities or to tell someone they don't want to talk to them.

If someone is not showing obvious signs that they are interested, don't push. Most girls do not play "hard to get", they actually really just don't want to talk to you.